Clean desk yields thought on streamlined agenda

The boss is after us to clean off our desks again, so you know what that means.

All the little odds and ends on scraps of paper I couldn't quite bear to throw away are getting set in print this morning. To whit:

Bumper sticker seen in Topeka:

"It takes a village of idiots to raze a historic building."

And this:

In a recent column, I quoted from an article in Governing magazine by Rob Gurwitt about some problems being experienced in Hartford, Conn., and indicating a lot of Hartfordites were blaming their city manager form of government.

Who would have guessed that anyone in Topeka would know enough about Hartford to refute it.

But our own Public Works Director Jeff White does and did.

"My first boss in local government was a former city manager of Hartford," he wrote. "His reports of the city's success were much more positive than Gurwitt's reports of today.

"I think the answer has little to do with strong city manager vs. weak mayor, and much more with socioeconomics, tax base, flight to the suburbs, and all the problems of an old, East Coast, decaying inner city."

This might be an appropriate place to inject a couple of observations about journalism:

"Everything you read in the newspapers is absolutely true except for that rare story of which you happen to have firsthand knowledge."

--- Erwin Knoll

"My sources are unreliable, but their information is fascinating."

---Ashleigh Brilliant

And how about this one? It would be a shame to discard this one. It supposedly is a true story.

It was sent by my friend John Gillon. He is a lawyer in Washington, D.C., now, but I met him when he was a journalist, so it is OK.

This allegedly took place in a courtroom in Birmingham, Ala.

He had received it from another lawyer, who advised him, "It points up the need to be ever vigilant, poised on the edge of your chair, ready to rise and make that critical objection before the other side can slip one past, in, on or through you.

"I give you the Motion to Swat":

The Court: Next witness.

Ms. Olschner: Your Honor, at this time I would like to swat Mr. Buck in the head with his client's deposition.

The Court: You mean read it?

Ms. Olschner: No, sir. I mean to swat him [in] the head with it.

Pursuant to Rule 32, I may use the deposition "for any purpose" and that is the purpose for which I want to use it.

The Court: Well, it does say that.

(Pause.)

The Court: There being no objection, you may proceed.

Ms. Olschner: Thank you, Judge Hanes.

(Whereupon Ms. Olschner swatted Mr. Buck in the head with a deposition.)

Mr. Buck: But Judge ...

The Court: Next witness.

Mr. Buck: We object.

The Court: Sustained. Next witness.

Finally, there is this note I scribbled to myself intending to make a helpful suggestion to the mayor about organizing the weekly city council agenda better:

The city council agenda needs to be streamlined.

Items are organized into categories such as "old business," "new business," "first reading of ordinances," etc.

There is a category called "consent agenda" that is a nice feature to speed up the meetings somewhat. It contains items considered so routine and non-controversial that the council can adopt the whole package in a single vote.

We could simplify the agenda by recognizing reality and simply grouping things into one of two categories: the consent agenda and the dissent agenda.

No need to guess which part would contain the largest number of items.

Mike Hall can be reached at

(785) 295-1193 or mhall@cjonline.com.

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