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Scientist studies others' gray matter in effort to understand why

Topeka Capital-Journal, The, Oct 23, 2000 by LISA M. SODDERS Capital-Journal

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"One more misconception is that these disorders are not treatable," Taylor said. "The success rate of treatment --- not cure - -- is in the 60 percent range, where heart disease is 40 percent."

Four years ago, when Taylor was 37, she had a rare form of stroke, an arterio-venous malformation that put pressure on the language centers of the left hemisphere of her brain.

"It's the most common form of stroke that hits people in their prime," Taylor said. "It's a congenital disorder; I was born with an artery that was directly connected to a vein with no capillary network in between to function as a buffer between a high-pressure artery and a low-pressure vein. When that artery blasted the vein with too much pressure, it popped off, and I had a major hemorrhage happen."

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Taylor woke up that morning with a pounding headache behind her left eye, but with a difference: this pounding headache came with the caustic kind of pain that happens when you bite into ice cream, she said. She hopped on her cardio-glider but started to notice that her perception of reality was altering, that her hands suddenly looked weird.

"I thought, 'Wow,' because I'm a brain scientist and my whole focus my entire life has been how does our brain create our perception of reality," Taylor said. "And here I was, having an altered perception and being aware it was altered. I got into the shower, and I was having problems with my balance, but wasn't in any pain other than the headache. I felt as though my body was becoming a fluid instead of a solid, and the ability to determine the boundaries of where I began and where I ended in relationship to the environment was completely blurred. My body image and perception of self was disintegrating."

It wasn't until her right arm became completely paralyzed that Taylor realized she was having a stroke. And even then, it took her another hour and a half to actually figure out how to get help.

"I kept forgetting," Taylor said. "I had to keep intoning, 'What is it I'm doing?' I didn't know my brain cells were swimming in a pool of blood."

"By the end of that morning, I could not speak, could not understand spoken language at all, visual stimulus was extremely painful," Taylor said. "I lost all my science, all my art, music, I even lost the concept of 'mother.' I was emptied. I thought that I died."

She had to relearn how to speak, walk, and read; fortunately, her mother moved in with her and helped her. Today, she said she could go back to the lab if she chose to do so, but her priorities have shifted.

"When the stroke happened on my left hemisphere, I had been very 'left,' very analytical --- I was a brain scientist at Harvard --- and after the stroke, my right hemisphere became dominant," Taylor said. "My right side is very artistic, very musical, is very much friendly. A lot of people would joke with me and say, 'I like you so much better since the stroke.' "

Taylor is writing a book about her experience and also does a lot of volunteer work with a stroke education and awareness group. Since stroke is the No. 1 disabler, Taylor said she feels it is critical that people understand what it feels like to experience one so they can get help as soon as possible. She said she also hopes to educate the medical community about "what I needed most in order to recover, and what I needed versus what I got."

Scientist studies others' gray matter in effort to understand why

Topeka Capital-Journal, The, Oct 23, 2000 by LISA M. SODDERS Capital-Journal

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