SOUTH'S BEST GRUDGE MATCHES, THE

Any week's biggest contests often involve longtime rivals looking to top each other in a monumental battle of wills.

Rivalries add spice to the tasty stew that is college football. They provide memories in the good years, hope in the bad ones, and something to talk about around the watercooler on Monday.

As fun as these games are to watch on TV, they're a zillion times more fun in person. I remember attending my first Tennessee-Alabama game. After a fierce struggle, the Vols turned the Tide, ending an 11-year drought. Fans stormed the field, brought down the goalposts, and marched them through the streets.

LET BEDLAM REIGN

It wasn't until I moved to Stillwater, Oklahoma, that I witnessed the animosity that can accompany an intrastate rivalry. Every game between the OState Cowboys and the OU Sooners is referred to as "bedlam," because bedlam often does break out when these teams meet. They're out for blood and bragging rights, and a football game can turn into a boxing match about as quickly as a funnel cloud can spawn a tornado.

Both Oklahoma schools field talented athletes in a host of sports, so there's ample opportunity to avenge hurtful losses. Still, OU usually dominates "bedlam football." In fact, the Cowboys'vehement dislike of the Sooners probably springs from years of merciless pummeling. One man I knew, a renowned scientist and all-around upstanding member of the community, taught his young grandson to say "Bye-bye! See you in Norman!" when flushing the toilet.

Though OSU's David has felled OUs Goliath enough times to get their attention, the Sooners consider Texas their real nemesis. Indeed, the Red River Shootout is one heck of a football game, though Bobby Stoops and his boys have whipped up on Mack & Co. pretty soundly in recent years.

Which leads me to a theory I have about this game:Thumping the Horns probably helps Oklahomans of every ilk come to terms with a serious inferiority complex. If you don't believe me, check out the slogans the states have had: "Texas: It's like a whole other country" vs.'Oklahoma is OK." See what I mean?

OF TIDE AND TIGERS

Then I was introduced to one of the most intense rivalries of all-Alabama vs. Auburn. I knew I was in for something special when a coworker who personified Southern graciousness confided that her husband no longer "allowed" her to attend Iron Bowl games because of her "tendency to forget her manners."

I didn't understand what she meant until I was caught in a crush of fans before a game at Jordan-Hare Stadium. A couple of intrepid Bama fans tried to push through a mass of Auburn faithful lining the pregame Tiger Walk. When the crimson-clad duo refused to turn around, the mob began screaming, "Ti-ger Meat! Ti-ger Meat! Ti-ger Meat!" Now that's intensity.

I'd like to say it's all just fun and games, but you'd see through my Pollyannaish attempt to rationalize the irrational.The fact is, I can't explain why we love to hate our rivals so much. But I do know this: I'd rather go hungry for a year than have to eat crow when my team ends up on the losing side of the scoreboard.

CASSANDRA M. VANHOOSER

Copyright Southern Progress Corporation Sep 2004
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