Close online relationships in a national sample of adolescents

Adolescence,  Fall, 2002  by Janis Wolak,  Kimberly J. Mitchell,  David Finkelhor

• E-mail
• Print
• Link

DISCUSSION

This survey found that, in the past year, most youth Internet users between the ages of 10 and 17 used the Internet to converse with people they had never met face-to-face. However, most of these online conversations did not lead to close relationships or face-to-face meetings. Some were one-time encounters, and others were short-lived exchanges or casual friendships. Nonetheless, a significant number of youths developed close friendships online (14%), had face-to-face meetings with people they met online (7%) and developed romantic relationships via the Internet (2%). Given the extent of Internet use among young people in the age categories covered by this survey, and given adolescents' natural interest in forming close relationships, the number of youths involved in close online friendships, romantic relationships, and face-to-face meetings with online friends is quite large and likely to increase as Internet use grows.

Age-related characteristics. With a few exceptions, youths were using the Internet to pursue relationships with peers. Most of the close online relationships occurred between youths who were close enough in age that they might attend school together or be together in other environments where teenagers and young adults would commonly meet.

A few of the youths had close friendships with adults who were significantly older. Cases where adults have used online relationships to manipulate and exploit adolescents have been a focus of concern by law enforcement, and we did find one relationship that looked exploitative. However, most of the relationships between adolescents and adults seemed benign. This is probably one of the areas where the Internet reflects "real life." Young people who go online can meet helpful and interesting adults who can offer valuable companionship and advice, but they can also run into people who would cause them harm.

Gender differences. The stereotype that girls, but not boys, use the Internet to form relationships is not bolstered by the data. The boys were as likely as the girls to converse online with people they did not know face-to-face and to report face-to-face meetings and online romances. Girls were somewhat more likely to report both casual and close online friendships, but the differences were not large.

Cross-gender relationships. Interestingly, we found that most close online relationships crossed gender lines. This is in contrast to face-to-face relationships where same-sex relationships predominate (Hartup, 1993). Among youths, the Internet may be serving as an important vehicle for communication between the genders, especially for teenage boys, who reported higher rates of cross-gender relationships than did girls. The unique qualities of Internet communication may facilitate contact between teenage girls and boys in a number of ways. The Internet may provide adolescents with a means of getting acquainted that is free of the distraction and awkwardness generated by the physical presence of someone of the opposite sex. Youths may feel less self-conscious online and more likely to be judged on their "inner" self than on their physical characteristics. For some, communication may be easier because they can compose what they are going to say. Also, teens may feel freed from adolescent social networks where f ace-to-face friends and acquaintances can gossip and judge their behavior. The Internet may provide an appreciated level of privacy.