Preparing children for hurricanes

Rehashing critical situations the family has faced previously may be used as a springboard for discussion. This has the added advantage of providing members an opportunity to work through their unresolved feelings (frequently residual guilt and sadness) from earlier crises. To use knowledge and psychological strength acquired during a crisis can promote psychological well-being and self-esteem. Family experiences with prior crises such as serious illness are helpful.

These discussions should be geared to the developmental level of the youngsters. Siblings can improve communication among themselves by explaining and re-interpreting what is discussed to each other. The importance of prevention and preparation should be stressed. Examples of successful outcomes resulting from previous preparation and/or prevention should be provided.

Early on, the family should devise a general strategy, including delineating each member's emergency role. It is important that children have a task based on their level of development. The responsibility of a personal task is an important way of helping reduce anxiety and also furthers over-all competence.

While individual roles in a family differ by personal temperament, it is important for parents to assure that each child plays a significant role. That can set the stage for the person's future role modeling outside the family. Children easily understand and pick up on that. This is the time for parents to understand they are teaching parental and gender roles by example. The family whose mother is not part of the crisis arrangements because "she gets too nervous" sends a powerful negative message to the children about the role of females in crisis situations.

In these discussions, parents may contrast different coping mechanisms to one another. Active participation should be seen as favorable, while reactions such as being so frightened that panic or "freezing" results should be discouraged. This can be an advantageous time to discuss the many possible ways families may fare with potential catastrophe. These are difficult topics. Families generally have abdicated their role in teaching their children about emotionally charged subjects. The result has been an overreliance on the schools to provide this education, which they have done poorly.

An important way families manage potential catastrophe is with insurance, a concept vital to any hurricane plan. Conversations regarding property insurance can lead to more sensitive issues such as Social Security, pension, disability, and health and life insurance--all examples of methods to deal with unexpected personal catastrophes. The underlying tone is that advanced planning and active involvement coupled with a dose of optimism are effective methods of overcoming danger and anxiety.

These talks about insurance may bring up issues of death and dying. Discussing such topics in an open fashion helps to explore fears such as what will happen if "Daddy or Mommy get sick or die"? Children who learn that parents have taken contingencies for such unforeseeable events have increased comfort and reduction in anxiety.