Finding someone for New Year's eve - Dating - Brief Article

With about a month left to find a date for New Year's Eve, pressure is mounting for American singles who would rather pair up with someone special than face the evening alone. One-third of adults place a high priority on finding a romantic partner to share the celebration, according to a survey by udate.com, an online matchmaking service for the 25-and-older crowd.

Respondents were quite clear about their desires for the evening. While 20% would spend New Year's Eve with someone they don't know well if they think it will be fun, the majority of singles want to have a caring connection with the person they choose to share the beginning of the new year. Fifty-two percent prefer to spend the evening with someone they care about and would otherwise opt out of sharing the evening with a date. Whether it's a formal party or a casual get-together, 42% envision an evening spent with other couples, though 30% want to be alone with a significant other for the romantic holiday, a sentiment expressed twice as often by men than by women.

What dynamics are important in a date? The overriding mandate for 50% of singles is a sense of humor and fun. Romantic chemistry ranked as the second most important consideration. Seventy-seven percent found these same characteristics desirable in a long-term mate. Thoughtfulness and spirituality were not deemed very significant considerations by either group.

There's still plenty of time to meet your mate for New Year's Eve, and possibly forever after. maintains udate.com's professional relationship expert and romance coach, Leslie Karsner, who offers this advice:

Dare to go online. It's the fastest, most-efficient way to meet a wide range of people who have the potential to fit your desires. Meeting online gives you more control than doing so in a singles bar. Moreover, you can get to know them better through continual communication. To aid your efforts, take the time to complete the information requested in your profile and essay, and be shy about posting a photo.

Go fishing. There's a big of singles out there. Don't hesitate to introduce yourself to more than one person if the fit seems like it might be right. Then let the repartee take over and help you cull your candidates.

Don't overshare. One of the biggest mistakes people make, particularly when chatting online, is providing too much personal information. While you want to be open and honest, there's still room for some mystery. Don't let e-mail turn your prospect into a best buddy before you have had the chance rule out your romantic interests.

Voice-to-voice communication. If you think you've found someone you like, don't wait longer than three e-mail exchanges to call and talk to him or her personally. The world of e-mail can be very safe and comfortable, but nothing replaces the vibes you can get by hearing the other person's voice. If you still think it's a fit, arrange to meet one another. It doesn't have to be more than a coffee at first. You decide where it goes from there.

The rules of romance still apply. Technology can help pare down the contenders, but building relationship still takes that human connection. If you've found someone you like, don't be hesitant to let him or her know. Call to follow up on a date; send flowers; and, most of all, enjoy.

COPYRIGHT 2001 Society for the Advancement of Education
COPYRIGHT 2002 Gale Group