Phenomenal Fathers - role models of African American fatherhood

Hammond has long been committed to helping people reach their full potential in life, and his personal and professional mission is to "lift up the Lord Jesus Christ, be an effective witness and to help others." That's why, he says, it was important to adopt a son, and he may adopt other children when he has "more time to spend at home."

Balancing family time with his booming career is difficult, he says, but he makes the best use of time with his children when he has it. "Whatever time you have, don't spend it fussing at the kids," he says. "You should make the time as quality as possible. I make sure that my daughter gets the proper amount of hugs. I affirm who she is, and my son as well. I really build them up. I figure that if I build up their self-esteem, nobody else will ever be able to tear it down."

He says that fathers should be good to their children and be good role models. He points out that many Black men have not had the benefit of having their fathers as a part of their upbringing and, consequently, they don't know how to be good parents. "If your father didn't do for you, that doesn't mean that you don't do for your kids," Hammond advises. "I say seek God. He is the ultimate father. Seek God about the kids and how you can be the absolute best father."

Many fathers work hard, sometimes even two or more jobs, but he says it is important for Black men to spend quality time with their children. "Lead them to God the best you can," he says. "It is crazy out in the world today, so you have to set a good example. Take your children to church; don't just send them. Lead them to God. Let them see that you are the man of your home and you love God first. If you are struggling in certain areas, let them know that God is there for you, and they can see the process work out."

--Lynn Norment

FRED BROWN

ENTER the Brown household and the first thing you feel is the warmth. Fred and his 9-year-old son, Fred II, tease each other and hug. They finish each other's jokes. The affection comes easy and often. The fourth-grader may wrap his arms around his dad's waist or snuggle next to him as he talks to company. It's a loving relationship filled with an enviable closeness. The circumstances make it even more exceptional: Brown raises his son alone. He is cook, comforter, disciplinarian, nurse, sounding-board, teacher and buddy.

"Every day I pray either with him or over him while he sleeps," says the 35-year-old applications engineer for 3COM Corporation. "I pray for guidance to help us have a balanced Christian life."

Like a growing number of men, Brown is a single father. While stories of deadbeat dads scream from headlines, men like Brown toil quietly on the sidelines, guiding sons and daughters to adulthood on their own.

"I was standing right there when Fred [II] was born," he says. "I remember he was about 15 seconds old, holding on to my baby finger; it was such a tight grip. I just felt this bond."

The Chicago native says he always dreamed of having a traditional family. But after he and the boy's mother split, he says they decided he would make the best custodial parent while she would visit the child every other weekend. From the beginning, Brown says he understood the meaning of that decision.