The Social Dimension Of Sex - Review

Journal of Sex Research,  May, 2001  by Edward S. Herold

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The Social Dimension Of Sex. By Roy F. Baumeister and Dianne M. Tice. Needham Heights, MA: Allyn and Bacon, 2001, 294 pages. Paper, $18.00.

The authors of this book take a fresh and at times a provocative approach to analyzing the social dimensions of sex. They certainly stretch and challenge commonly held beliefs about the social aspects of sex. In many insightful ways, the authors show us how the concepts from diverse areas of social psychology can be used to analyze several key issues in human sexuality. In the introduction, the authors openly acknowledge that they are not concerned with being politically correct and that certain groups such as radical feminists will disagree with many of their basic assumptions.

A major focus of the book is on using theories from social psychology to explain gender differences. However, almost all of the discussion pertains to heterosexual couples.

The authors believe that most of the theorizing about sexuality has been based on either an evolutionary or a social constructionist approach and that other theories have consequently been neglected. In their book, they place major emphasis on social exchange theory, which explains behavior in terms of seeking rewards and avoiding costs. With respect to sexuality, a key assumption of the authors is that sex is a resource that women have and that men want. It is not simply the equal sharing of a pleasurable experience. Accordingly, if men wish to have sex with women, they must offer something in exchange. This perspective leads to the conclusion that sex is a major form of power that women can use to control men.

In Chapter 2, the authors intensively analyze research findings regarding the frequency of sex and the number of partners that people have. They use social comparison theory to show how people use survey data to compare their sex lives with those of others. Many people, in making these comparisons, feel that their sex lives are inadequate when measured against their perceptions of what others are doing. The book presents an excellent discussion of possible causes for the gender discrepancy in the reported number of sexual partners. A large part of the gender difference is explained by the desire of men to have more sexual partners than do women.

Chapter 3 discusses the relationship between self-esteem and sexuality, and points out that the findings regarding this relationship are contradictory. Most research indicates that people with higher self-esteem engage in more sexual activity. The authors note that while those with higher self-esteem have greater confidence, and thus are able to attract more sex partners, the relationship can also be reciprocal in that having more sex could lead to higher self-esteem. They postulate that self-acceptance is a central component of self-esteem. More women than men have negative feeling about their body, and especially regarding their genitals. However, very high feelings of self-esteem can also lead to unrealistic optimism and consequently are associated with a greater degree of sexual risk-taking.

The debate regarding the role of biology versus culture is amply covered in Chapter 4. While the authors conclude that both of these factors play a role in sexual behavior, they stress that the interrelationship between culture and biology is a highly complex one.

Chapter 5 deals with the eternal gender issue of whether women have a lower sex drive than do men. This is clearly one of the most interesting and possibly controversial chapters in the book. The authors begin by discussing the perspective that women actually have a stronger sex drive as evidenced by the fact that women do not have a refractory period and are better able to have multiple orgasms. Here, the authors state that women definitely have a greater potential capacity for sex than do men. However, when it comes to sexual motivations, they believe that men are more motivated to have sex than are women. They use as evidence research showing that men, when compared to women, think about sex more often, have more partners, and have a greater diversity of sexual experience, especially masturbation. Using exchange theory, the authors postulate that it would be to women's disadvantage to have the stronger sex drive, because then women would not have sexual power over men.

Four theories are analyzed as possible explanations for why female sexuality is more likely to be suppressed than is male sexuality. The first is that biologically women's sex drive is inherently weaker than that of men's. The second is that the dangers of sex are greater for women so that women have to be more cautious in their choice of sexual partners. The third theory is that of a male conspiracy to suppress the female sex drive so that men can better control women. The final theory is the female conspiracy theory, which states that it is mainly women who control and restrict other women's sexuality. According to this theory, women believe that if other women give sex too readily to men, then sex would become a less valuable resource and women would lose one of their key advantages over men. The authors believe that the female conspiracy theory is the major contributor to the control of female sexuality. The major weakness here is the choice of the word conspiracy which has strong emotional undertones and conjures up images of women consciously getting together to block other women from "giving" away too much sex. My own belief is that rather than any one of these theories predominating, each of them contributes to the limiting of female sexuality.